MEGA CLEARANCE EVENTUP TO 0% OFFEVERYTHING MUST GO (NOTHING IS GOING, WE PRINT TO ORDER)ENDS IN , THEN RESTARTS
DEPARTMENT OF PETTYBUREAU OF GRIEVANCESQUERELA NUMQUAM DORMITEST. MMXXVIDept. of Petty™
Sticky Warlock

ITEM NO. DP-NEW-2S · STICKER

Sticky Warlock™

Three inches by three inches of a man who has already won the argument. Satin finish.

 

Retail value $4,999.00

Printed to order. Ships in 1 to 2 weeks, US only. Shipping · Returns

[ Official Statement ]

He lifted his glasses an inch. Now he lives on your laptop.

The portrait arrived through the mail slot with no return address and a faint smell of cologne. We put him on a shirt. We put him on a hoodie. He looked at us over his glasses until we put him on a sticker too.

Same cross, same houndstooth, same dripping black metal lettering, shrunk down to three by three inches on satin. He is smaller now. He is not any less sure of himself.

Stick him somewhere he can keep an eye on things. A laptop, a toolbox, the inside of a locker, the dashboard of a car you are not proud of. Walk away slowly. He will handle it from there.

[ Specifications ]

Specifications

Size
3 by 3 inches
Finish
Satin
Backing
Peel and stick
Made
Printed to order, ships in 1 to 2 weeks, US only
Gaze
Direct. Slightly amused. Now pocket-sized.

[ Testimonials ]

Citizens Have Said Things

Every testimonial below was written by the Department.

[ Frequently Denied Questions ]

Frequently Denied Questions

Is it the same art as the shirt?

Same man, same jewelry, same lettering. He insisted.

Will it come off?

Eventually. He will decide when.

Where should I stick it?

Somewhere people will have to look at him. That is all he has ever wanted.

[ Final Notice ]

Buy the Sticky Warlock. The Department will know.

Back to the order form

Do not apply to people. Do not apply to animals. Do not apply to anything he would not approve of. He will know.

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